My friend James lost his mom this Saturday.

She had been sick for a long time, but they thought she had more time than this.  She got to be at home, peaceful, in her own bed, with her family around her just like she wanted, but of course my heart goes out to him and his family.

Too many of my friends have lost their moms in the past year; James is also in the sad club of being an orphan now too.  He told me that it hit him on Saturday: “this is the feeling that Erin talked about.  It’s horrible!”  That feeling, like my aunt put it, that no one’s behind you now.  That person who worries and thinks about you like no other person is gone.  It doesn’t matter how old you are when it happens or how much you had to take care of them; it’s an empty spot that doesn’t get filled again.

He said he all of sudden remembered, as he held his mom’s hand, how I had wished I could have gotten one more Mom hug, so he leaned down and hugged his mom that last time so he could keep it in his memory.  He also whispered, “Mom, if this is what you want, if you’re tired of fighting, it’s okay to go to sleep now.  You don’t have to stay for me.”  She passed away a little while after that.

I hope this is the end: no more losses.  We have enough hurting hearts to last a very long time.

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4 responses to “My friend James lost his mom this Saturday.

  1. My mom’s mom will be gone for 7 years in November. Seven years and still her (it’s more her loss than mine, a grandmother is no match for a mother in our case) loss is still so great.

    As she puts it, “The only person who knew me from the first minute is gone.”

  2. If you speak with James, please let him know that he and his family are in my thoughts and prayers. He is such a wonderful man… I am very sorry for his loss and the sadness that are in their hearts..

  3. My mother is gone only 7 months now. I’m just sure I’ll never get used to her absence.

    Always in love with your blogging Erin.

  4. Cindy, everyone who has lost their mom and dad tells me: it’ll never be the same. You never stop feeling their absence. And anyone who wasn’t close to a parent and hasn’t lost them can’t understand it.

    Hugs to you!

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